.

Friday, April 11, 2014

What's Up, Doc?



Damn, it's like a fucking ghost town here. I've made stops here every now and then but haven't paid it too much special attention.

Life. The bastard gets in the way.

In the last few months I've been super busy with, you guessed it, work...prepping for baseball season is the worst, learning to deal/cope with a severely depressed mother, an attention whore of an adorable little dog and trying to get knocked up.

That's right, this belly needs a baby in it! Hear that universe? I said it. Actually I've been saying it for the last few months and still nothing has happened. Fuck you universe.

There have been tears, I have told myself "it'll happen when it happens" and still...nothing happens. Stupid body.

I finally went to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist last month, she ran tons of tests to find out what's going on...did I really have PCOS? Turns out, I do and I don't. *eye roll*

All of my tests were on the border so she didn't feel comfortable labeling me PCOS...instead she went with "your ovaries are dumb". Ok, not literally. But basically one of my ovaries is a healthy 31 years old and always on schedule, the other not so much. The other one is on the verge of 45 and headed for retirement so it's slow as shit.

Hello lack of ovulation, I'm Lin.

Good news is, she didn't want to waste any of my possibly limited birthing days (a no bullshit kinda doc, I instantly dug her), so she ordered me to start with a combo of Clomid (pills) and Menopur (injectable). All of which I started a few days ago. I'm a little nervous about the shot I have to give myself on Sunday but fuck it, if it gets me a kid, I'm game.

To be completely honest, when I first visited the doctor I had super high hopes, now, I've let that hope dwindle a little bit. Not that it's been easy. But the way I figure it, if I have low expectations then I won't be completely crushed if it doesn't happen this cycle. I'm realistic, nothing in life can be completely easy.

It's like they say, you have to really work for the things you want.

15 comments:

  1. Keepingmy fingers crossed that you soon will be knocked up:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Keeping my fingers crossed that you'll get those two pink lines soon! :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sending you a storm of baby dust. Best of luck girl!

    ReplyDelete
  4. It'll happen for you! I've always heard that most people get pregnant on their first round of Clomid (it's some serious business); so there's that! Sending you positive baby vibes!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey friend, thinking good thoughts and prayers for you. I'm not in your exact situation but I've been diagnosed with something that's also not quite conducive to pregnancy. They keep running tests but they don't know what to do…my body just isn't functioning the way it's supposed to and that's super annoying. Anyway, I know how you feel! Try to have a good weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You're so strong. I know it sucks that it's taking so long. I'm glad they have ways to grow your chances! I'm rooting for you!! Keep me posted!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Good luck for you, Lin! I can imagine how frustrating and annoying this is. But things will work out for you, I know it! Fingers crossed!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hoping it all works out for you! You are definitely in my thoughts, even if you aren't around these parts much anymore! Don't give up yet!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Baby wishes being sent your way. You are going to be such a kick ass mom :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm glad to see that you are alright. I was getting worried!

    ReplyDelete
  11. First, huge hugs. I went to an RE and while he was like, "yeah, you have PCOS...here's what will fix it" and well, I used Clomid. Made me feel horrible...but it worked and it didn't and then well, we went different routes.

    Look, there will be days where hope is there and then one day it isn't. There will be bad days and good ones but we all HOPE that the good days outweigh the bad ones. Don't lose hope. Frustration - sure. Anger -of course. Hope...hold onto it.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I've missed you! Glad to hear from you! They say to quit thinking about it and it happens. But I think you just won't notice it didn't. Fingers crossed you'll have good news soon.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hi Lin, I've missed you around these parts - to be honest, life got in the way of my blogging too. There's no excuse for it really - like you say, just life. Best of luck with your baby-making. I know this doesn't help at all, but sometimes all you have to do is just relax. And it will happen. Fingers crossed for you!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thats awesome that you & your husband are trying for a baby, and that you are doing everything you can to make it happen, how exciting! My husband and I have been trying for a few years now without any luck, so I know your frustration and all the other feelings that come with this process. But fingers crossed that everything works out for you and your family! Sending you positive baby making vibes! :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sending you good baby making vibes! I have PCOS and have been trying for about 6 months and nada. Chlomid is my next step, my hopes are dwindling. My husband is super supportive and we both agree that if it happens GREAT if not that will be ok too we aren't going to let it take over our lives or sanity :)

    ReplyDelete

I love comments!