Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Just Say 'No'...And I'm Not Talking About Drugs

I'm totally having one of those moments where you ask yourself 'why the fuck did I do it?'

My problem is I'm too nice. Like sometimes, stupidly nice. Especially when it comes to my parents. For some reason, other than them giving me life, I feel like owe them something so I'm always eager to help where I can. Rusty's tried his best to stop me from always saying 'yes' to their favors but dude can only babysit me so many hours in a day.

Well now I'm dealing with the repercussions of being such a fucking nice person. Let me tell ya, it's not in the form of money or gifts.

Two years ago I was stupid enough to put my credit on the line for a truck my dad wanted to buy. Dude was ready to get it on his own when the bank said he needed a co-signer. They asked my brother, he's smart so he said 'fuck no', and that's when they came to me...the push-over.

Rusty begged me not to do it. We fought. I still did it. My thoughts were: he's my dad, he's got 2 jobs, the payments aren't that bad and he'll totally pay it on time.

Are you laughing yet? Yeah, I would be too.

As it turns out that second job was lost a few months after the purchase & the first one followed a few months ago. He's now been struggling to make the payments & has asked me what I'd think if he 'voluntarily repossessed' the car?

Yeeaah...not in a fucking million years old man.

Turns out a the word 'repossessed' being on your credit report doesn't do you any favors. Actually we're talking about that single world knocking your score down 80-100 points. Scary shit. So now I'm stuck having to deal with a truck that can't be paid & the possibility of my credit going down the toilet just because I couldn't say no.

My point? Listen to your spouse (they're usually right, even if you don't want to admit it), don't be a fucking push-over like me and definitely don't ever co-sign a goddamned thing for anyone...especially family.


  1. Oh girl...I so feel ya. The ex-husbands car was in my name and was supposed to get the loan transferred over for the divorce. He didn't, so I flew to go get the car and drive it back. I get there, the car's been repossessed. Awesomesauce.

    Silver lining? It'll go away in seven years if it happens. I know the folks need a vehicle, but maybe sell the car for what's owed and buy a cheap commuter car?

  2. Oh man that sucks! Have you been making the payments for him then?

  3. oh gosh, I'm sorry Lin! I feel your pain though. I fall into the Parent Guilt trap ALL the time! I know my parents asked to be removed from my College Loans - they cosigned - and they got it done. Not sure HOW that happened, but maybe you can look into it?

  4. My best friend asked me to co-sign and I said NO! I didn't want to mess up my credit.

    I did however say yes to my parents too. (Its hard to say no since I live with them.) The only reason I said yes is because I knew I would pay the payments if they couldn't....and they can't so I am paying most of the payment now.

    Yeah it really is never a good idea to co-sign for anyone.

  5. As an incredibly stupid push-over myself, I feel ya.

  6. Oh no, that totally sucks! Well, I guess I can understand that it is really hard to say no to your parents, even if everyone tells you to - they're still your parents, so you feel some kind of obligation. Still, this situation totally sucks, and I just hope for you that it all turns out okay.

  7. aww man thats brutal! no way of getting out of it?
    too hard to say no to anything parents ask!

  8. I won't go into details, but I'm still in a battle with collection agencies over a credit card balance on a card I let a relative use. It seemed so innocent and a nice thing to do at the time. What could go wrong? They said they'd pay it. So, I know a little bit how you're feeling. You just have to learn from it, try to let it go, and never do it again.

  9. Oh man! I work as a loan officer myself, so I see all sorts of shit. The only suggestion I can make is to try to sell it for as much as you can, and then tell him to see if his bank will refinance the remaining balance as a personal loan (in his name only) with a lower monthly payment. I work at a really small credit union, which I know is different from bigger banks, but we would always rather work with someone in a situation like that than to repo a vehicle becuase when they get repo'd, they sell at auction for usually 50% of the value, and we're still out the money! I just suggest that you and your dad try to sit down with the bank and discuss options!

  10. ugh... that defies all laws of karma. When I was 19 I asked my millionaire gramma to co-sign a car loan for me and she said "no" - I remember being super pissed off right up until the bank said I didn't need one.
    being nice sucks. I recently stuck my neck out for some of my clients only to find out they've been lying to me all along - like they have 5 kids apprehended in another province kinda lie - you think that'd come up in one of the million conversations I had with them... #jeesh.

  11. I have always been the daughter that was a push over. My mom did some pretty messed up things while I was growing up and she had a prob with paying bills. So when the stuff was shut off, she used my name. I hope you find a solution and can figure something out and remember....JUST SAY NO!!!!!!! mmmmkkkay?

  12. Oh man!! I did this once and I will never forget it. My credit TUMBLED and it took forever to bring it up. So much hard work. Now when someone needs something like this, I just say no. I hope y'all figure something out so your credit doesn't have to take a hit!

  13. Oh no, that sounds like a bad situation. I am so sorry. I don't know much about the American credit system but is there nothing you can do? I totally feel you because I can't say no either.


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