Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Ten On Tuesday

1. I'm not normally extra friendly to my co-workers so when I go out of my way to say "good morning" (with a smile) to the biatch sitting in front of my cubicle & she doesn't even acknowledge me it's pretty much a slap to the fucking face. She is now officially on my shit list.

2. Mother nature is using my ovaries as punching bags. Ouch!

3. Nothing is more annoying then looking forward to a cold refreshing smoothie all day & then finding out you can't have it because the freaking machine is broken. How difficult is it to post a handwritten sign near the menu stating it's broken? Impatient customers like myself would totally appreciate not having to waste their time/gas waiting in your stupid line.

4. Jonah Hill has lost a crap-ton of weight, yay him! But as he's been losing weight, he's been losing funny. Seriously, he was way funnier when he was fat. Also, dude is starting to look a little feminine...wth?

5. There's no need to keep reapplying your smelly ass Bath & Body lotion every 10 minutes. We can all smell the 5 lbs of lotion you're wearing, how the hell can't you?

6. Scrubbing toilets is the most disgusting thing about cleaning a bathroom. I had toilet water splash up on my face while scrubbing it the other day & I nearly vomited.

7. Dude, really? Why can't you just love them regardless? I love this Yahoo user's answer! -->

(Click photo to enlarge - source)

8. It's always nice when I watch a movie I thought would totally suck & I'd hate but end up really liking it. *cough* Going The Distance *cough*

9. Watching the Hangover II with my parents my have been more awkward than the time they asked me if Rusty & I were sexually active. Seeing chicks with dicks on a huge screen is not ideal but it's even worse when your dad is sitting next to you.

10. Did ya know that up until 2008 Texas banned sex toys? I know, what prudes right!? (Note: fellow blogger & Texan, Gini has squashed this Texas fact. Thanks for clarifying BFG!). Also, 3% of woman plan household chores during the dirty deed and a UK study showed that 80% of couples wearing socks while 'doing it' were able to orgasm compared to the 50% that weren't...yep. No need to thank me for today's useless {probably untrue} sex knowledge, I know you guys totally loved every minute of it ;) . . . .~Click here for more~



  1. 1. You should sneeze on her keyboard and lick her phone (Dead Like Me reference).

    2. Ugh. Yeah. Have fun with that.

    3. That blows.

    4. I noticed that too. Sort of like Seth Rogen.

    5. Kinda reminds me of junior high when the boys would douse themselves with cologne after gym.

    6. Well, at least it was semi-clean right? I mean, it could have been way worse.

    7. Yeah. That.

    8. Hmmm. Will check that out.

    9. Eew.

    10. Hmmm, I don't think that's true because I'm pretty sure I bought a sex toy before 2008.

  2. Sorry it was an awkward moment for you to see chicks with dicks on the large screen. I was by myself when I saw The Hangover II so I cracked up at the big reveal (if you'll pardon the pun).

  3. I'm really not looking forward to aunt flo's return after a whole 9 month vacation from her. This should be interesting. I agree with your comment about Jonah Hill. It's really sad, actually. Also, I HATE people who put on lotion like that. It kills my allergies. And thanks for reminding me to watch Going the Distance. I almost forgot about that movie!

  4. Number one better watch out, lmao!!

    And totally get the whole lotion thing. I hate smelling other people who stink. Barf.


  5. I whole heartedly agree with #1...if I'm gonna go OUT of my way to say hi to you, you bet your ass you better respond.

    Yeah, What's up with the comics losing weight recently? First Seth Rogen now Jonah Hill. and yeah he looks like a woman!

    Texas blows.

  6. I love you...I'm giggling...most importantly though, I can't even understand how someone could not say 'good morning' back? She was probably raised by...well, by something nasty.
    Ok, gotta go have sex...I need to plan the menu for this weekends barbq!

  7. I really liked Going the Distance too! I thought the characters talked like real people and Charlie Day makes everything a little bit better!


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