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Monday, February 7, 2011

Computer News, Stubborn News, Good News

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This weekend was over way too quickly. I definitely could've done another day off...definitely. A few days ago I posted about possibly getting a new netbook or Tab & yesterday Rusty & I went to Best Buy to pick up my brand new cherry red netbook.

I was already leaning towards it but all of your comments did it for me, thanks! It's really cute and even though I'm not a huge fan of the color red, I'm not really minding it all that much. I am having difficulty going from a 15 inch monitor to a 10.1 though...it seem so freaking tiny! I suppose it'll take some time to get used.

Rusty & I had a bit of a fight last night. I can with all honesty say it was my fault. I, again, put him last on my list and when he called me on it I acted like the victim. We argued, I {semi} yelled and then huddled in my corner of the bed to cry & sulk until I was ready to apologize. I know he's not by any means perfect but I don't know how he puts up with my mood swings & stubbornness. In the end I wiggled my way under his arm & apologized. I just don't know why I cant give in earlier & admit somethings my fault instead of dragging it on and making it worse. Am I alone in doing this? Wait...I don't think I want to know. Ok, only tell me IF you're the same way cause I don't really need to know that you're a better person than I am, ha-ha.

Also, my brother & SIL are going to have a baby! I'm SO excited for them & for me, because I love little babies that I can dote on (and then hand back when they cry). From what the SIL has told me, she's only been off BC for like a month & a half but she's already a month pregnant so either my brother has determined swimmers or she's full of sh*t. Either way I get a new baby niece or nephew in a few months. It's going to be nice to finally have one that's closer to me than 400 miles.

Now for the honest part to the last paragraph: After the initial shock & happiness of the news wore off, I was jealous. I always envisioned myself having the first baby, the first to give my parents a grandchild. But they're ready. Financially, mentally, all of it...they're set & I'm jealous {but happy}. I'm hoping that once their baby is born I'll get that feeling in the ovaries that says it's time, go home & get to work but I'm afraid it won't. Sometimes I wonder if I'm even cut out to be a mom. Sh*t, just read the 3rd paragraph of this post again & you'll see how selfish I am. Are you even allowed to be selfish if you're a mom? Ugh...I need to shut up. It's Monday & I need coffee.

How was your weekend? What did you think of the Black Eyed Peas craptacular performance at the Super Bowl?


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5 comments:

  1. oh how i am soo sure we could be best friends - though the turn out might not be very good for our husbands ; )

    i am incredibly stubborn, and i can pretty much turn anything around and make it my wonderful husbands fault. which i then apologize for...sometimes. but that has been one thing i have been working on!

    and yes, black eyed peas - come on!

    have a great week!

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  2. I think everyone is selfish and stubborn sometimes. I wouldn't sweat it, but if you know that you are, it is the first step to fixing your problems in the future.

    As for children, I didn't really want kids initially. For years my mother told me, "It is always different with your own." I didn't really believe her and took a leap of faith, but my mother is SO right. When you have your own children, you will know how to soothe their cries. You will not be selfish or stubborn because you will want to do what is best for them. I hope you get to experience it, Lin. I think you'll love it. It has been the best experience of my life.

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  3. I can be really stubborn too. In fact, I am a lot like my dad and we both had a moment on Saturday. We were just being us and it caused some grumpiness for a while.

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  4. girl, you are not selfish. i know that i don't want children because i don't think i want to sacrifice my own life, that's selfish, but guess what, it's my life. i'd rather not pretend that having children is what i want and then resenting it for the rest of my life.

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  5. Congrats on your netbook. I wanted to get a netbook, so let me know, how this one works out!

    I'm stubborn, too, so I can feel ya on this one. At least, you said sorry eventually and you did take ownership to your wrong doing. So, I think you are on the right track. By recognizing these actions, actually makes you a good person!

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