Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Hollywood Love, It's A Curse

So it was announced yesterday that a total of three well known Hollywood couples split.

Their reps stated everything is all good in the hood between the pair(s) & that the break ups are "amicable". But of course I think they're full of dung because we all know that most all breakups suck & there's always something that went wrong.

Couple #1...

Michael C. Hall (aka: Dexter) & Jennifer Carpenter (aka: Deb, his sister): I really thought these two would make it. I had really high hopes that they'd stick it out through thick & thin (aka: Micheal C. Halls' cancer) but they didn't. Turns out that after 2 years of marriage they're calling it quits, sucks but that's Hollywood.

My take on why they're splitting: Jeniffer couldn't take Michael being a WAY better actor than she is. I mean, homeboy just got nominated for a Golden Globe (Best Actor in a Drama)! Not that she's not a good actress or anything, she was pretty shitty at the beginning of Dexter & I think he might have been helping her out with acting lessons since then, but she was never going to be better & I'm sure that bothered her. She tried going out on her own & making Quarantine but after it flopping in the box office & all of the viewers (including myself) wanting gouge their eyes out with a pen, she opted to being part of the supporting cast. Whatever it really was that split these two up it just better not mess with the show because if that starts to happen I'm gonna start boycotting so they can get rid of her. I have no problem with Dexter's' sister Deb being murdered by one of the serial killers...nope I can live with that story line.

Update: The Hollywood rumor mill is hard at work & the dilio around town is that Michael C. Hall may have been rubbing up on his newest co-star for the season, Julia Stiles. Oh Oh...I love this fella but I'm not definitely not down with the vajayjay hopping when you're still attached to the ball & chain. Hopefully this isnt true :(

Couple #2...

Yep them too...hot-ass Ryan Reynolds & blah Scarlett Johansson are getting un-hitched. Honestly, I wasn't rooting for them & yes it's because I want Ryan Reynolds all to myself but that's SO besides the point. Two years ago these two decided to run away & get married all secret like because they didn't want to be the couple that always had their life in the papers. Guess keeping everything on the DL didn't really work out too well for them huh?

My take on why they're splitting: Ryan couldn't take Scarlett's clinginess anymore. She totally looks like one of those chicks who are constantly asking you where you're going, where you were & checks your cell phone whenever you're in the shower. She's considered one of the most beautiful woman in the world (I don't see it) but she's still that chubby insecure 7th grader on the inside. Ryan has too much hotness in him for just one woman so he decided to leave her in order to share his manly six-pack beauty with the world. That & he's decided that I'm the love of his life and is moving in with Rusty & I. What? I couldn't just toss Rusty out in the cold streets...

Couple #3...

Every teenyboppers favorite couple, Zac Effron & Vanessa Hudgens have ended their 5 year relationship. Guess they found out there's more to a relationship than high school musicals & Disney. I never paid too much attention to these two because they're pretty boring. With the exception of Vanessa's nude photos being spread on the interwebs, there really wasn't much too them but since they'd made it past the 2 year mark...more than we can say for the two pictured above them, I thought they one day might tie the knot. I'm sort of happy that these two cut it before it was too late though, they're young they should definitely get out there & date more. I mean if it didn't work out for Brittney & Justin what hope did these poor saps have?

My take on why they're splitting: I think it's a mixture of the reasons for couple #1 & #2. Vanessa is not as talented as Zac (did ya'll see 17 Again, it was pretty funny) & she's not as hot either. Maybe it was a bit of the high school sweetheart thing too. You know, you date in your teens, you think you're in love, graduate & go on to college only to find that there are way more people you should be dating & getting to know than the one dude/chick you met in your 120 student high school class. It ran it's course & they were smart enough to see it...good for them. It's either this or Vanessa found Zac trying on her shoes after she told him to stay out of her closet.


Why do you think they're splitting? Do you even care? lol


Happy Wednesday!



  1. Insightful analysis.

    Personally, I think it's all because they're egotistical narcissists, but your way of stating it is far kinder.

    And dude, I've had a crush on Ryan Reynolds since he was on Fifteen back in the day on Nickelodeon.

  2. heh! ohh ryan renolds - sorry i already have dibs. but i have a really sweet husband you can have ;-)

    and i agree wholeheartedly that, my word, if dexter gets all messed up...kill deb off! bwahaha.

  3. I don't really care about the first couple (maybe it's because I don't watch Dexter) but I was a bit upset to hear about the other two. After I sulked for a bit, I sucked it up and realized that Ryan and Zac are on my freebie five so I should be happy that they are now back on the market!

  4. it surprised me that dex and sis got married; hell I didn't even know they were dating. Besides, they look weird together so I think it's for the best. And totally get your take on why they're splitting; he's a way better actor than she is.

    When I heard about Ryan and that Scarlett chick, I have to say I was pretty happy because sorry ladies, he's MINE. I knew right off the bat that they wouldn't last; he's way cooler and more personable than she is. It's about time that he came to his senses and realized that we are M.F.E.O.

    the 3rd couple; I have no idea who they are so don't care.

  5. I was so relieved to see that Ryan and ScarJo broke up so that he can finally get down to the business of falling madly in love with me. ;-)

    I'm predicting Zac will be out of the closet in 2011. Maybe 2012 at the latest.

    As for Dexter...I think Deb's got one more season and then either she's leaving, getting killed, or the show will end. I sort of think the show will end. Sorry.

  6. Sigh, I only know who one of these actors are. I dont understand why any of them get married anyway. Unless I missed it I would totally love to read your take on Courtney and David:) Love these types of posts.

  7. I read today on People that "Scarlet got married too young. " Puh-leeze. It was 2 years ago and she was 28 (or something). Not like she was 18! *eyeroll* Apparently she didn't see his abs! Cuz that boy is hot! *drool*

  8. So I never knew that Dexter was married to his sister in real life. But that totally freaks me out. I dislike Deb's character so much! She's so annoying and needy, which is probably how she is in real life. Oh Dexter...*sigh*

    And, I was seriously a little heart broken when I saw that Ryan and Scarlett split. I think they look great together, and if anyone is going to tame him, it should be someone as beautiful as her.

    As for Zac & Vanessa...I could care less :)

  9. I have to admit.... I don't follow who is together or who is breaking up!

  10. I'm so glad I read this, I had no idea that any of them broke up!

    Dexter and Deb: I thought that would last too. But I think she's as grating as a Ped Egg, so good riddance. I don't see him with Julia Stiles, though. Not right.

    Ryan and Scarlett: Here's hoping that the real reason they broke up is that Ryan discovered he'd rather be with a chubby, divorced 44 year old woman who has four kids. Over here, Ryan!!!

    The other two: Two kids who went through the same experience together (fame, fortune, etc.). It was only a matter of time before they went kaput. I predict that Zac is going to go the Tom Cruise route. Vanessa will be schlepping jewelry or handbags on the Home Shopping Network before she hits 30.

    FUN BLOG ♥

  11. The only one I am sad about is Dexter and his sister. As creepy as it was that they were brother and sister on set, I liked them as a couple.
    I don't mind Ryan and Scarlett splitting because now I may have a shot at him (too).
    Don't care at all about Zack and Vanessa.

  12. Yes, same reaction as you. Thought Deb and Dex would make it. Enjoy Ryan being single again. And no real feeling on the last couple, though I think Zac is delicious in 17 Again. Woohoo!

  13. I was shocked to see Dexter & his sister divorcing (ha!). The other two I could care less about. I guess Ryan Reynolds can't win for losing. The think the whole reason him and Scarlet kept everything on the DL was because he was so public with Alanis and well, you know how that ended. Maybe he thought it was because he allowed the public to see too much of his private life? Who knows, but I'm glad he's on the market again. What to do with my ball and chain ...


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